The Past

 

I have sought to walk in the light of transformation, yearning to cast off the old man and don the new. Battles have been fought and won, and my character is reshaped, my lifestyle altered. Yet, I remain on the journey of uprooting those habits that cling tightly.

I strive for holiness because it is written, "Follow peace with all men, and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord" (Hebrews 12:14). My heart does not long to be praised by the world, for I know that outward appearance counts for nothing if the heart beats to a different tune in secret. "Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye are like unto whited sepulchres, which indeed appear beautiful outward, but are within full of dead men's bones" (Matthew 23:27).

I labor towards change, fully aware that the road is narrow. As Luke records, "Strive to enter in at the straight gate: for many, I say unto you, will seek to enter in, and shall not be able" (Luke 13:24). Change is a continual striving, not merely for external approval but for a heart transformed by the Spirit.

If you, too, struggle with habits that seem immovable or with shortcomings that weigh you down, do not fix your gaze on your failures. Rather, "be transformed by the renewing of your mind" (Romans 12:2), knowing that in Christ, you are "a new creation: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new" (2 Corinthians 5:17).

In this pursuit of becoming a better man, I have learned that the accuser—the devil—will tirelessly remind you of your past, dragging it into the light to make you falter. He will even work through those closest to you, subtly speaking through their words to highlight your shortcomings. You may be surprised when the very people you expect to understand and support you remain silent or fail to defend you. And yes, it stings deeply, for men and women will judge by what they see, focusing on the slips and imperfections, blind to the inner struggle and efforts to rise. "Man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart" (1 Samuel 16:7).

No matter how much you strive to show them your transformation, they may still bind you to the mistakes they witnessed. But know this: the devil is a liar. He may want to make you feel guilty, get angry, feel like a sinner and make you feel like a bad person with the sole purpose of deterring you from fighting on. When he tries to make you feel unworthy of sharing the gospel, remind him of this truth: "There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus" (Romans 8:1).

If you ever feel disqualified from serving Christ because of past errors, hear me clearly—God’s love and forgiveness are greater than any sin. The blood of Jesus washes us clean. "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (1 John 1:9).

Tell the devil, "I have forgiven myself, and God has forgiven me. My past is buried and forgotten." "As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us" (Psalm 103:12).

Do not be a grave robber. Do not exhume your past sins, nor the sins of others. "Love… keeps no record of wrongs" (1 Corinthians 13:5). When arguments arise in relationships—whether in marriage, family, or friendships—do not drag up past faults as weapons. Imagine if God did the same to us! "For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more" (Hebrews 8:12).

When the past rears its ugly head, it is a temptation. Satan would have us dwell on regrets, wondering what might have been. But next time he comes with these reminders, declare the victory you have in Christ. "Who shall lay any thing to the charge of God's elect? It is God that justifieth" (Romans 8:33).

And when Satan brings up your past, remind him of his future: "And the devil that deceived them was cast into the lake of fire and brimstone… and shall be tormented day and night for ever and ever" (Revelation 20:10).