Day Break

 

I dread darkness.

When the sun goes down and it’s time for some shut eye, l feel sad.

When men, women and children lay their heads down to slumber and get rejuvenated, I start my regrets, I get to work.

When it’s now time to rest, the struggles begin.

Under my closed eyes my mind is racing.

When one might think that I’m peaceful, reality is, I’m at war with myself. The pains and body aches are too much.

In my mind are choirs singing, trumpets being blown, drums beating, sermons being preached, prayers are made and all sorts of noise: I’m a mess…

When it gets tiring closing eyes but having no rest, I stay in my wake counting stars. Staring at blank roofs in the dark imagining the unimaginable.

All these things remind me of how weak and mortal I am. All these remind me of my sinful nature.

Marcus Aurelius once said, “The nearer a man comes to a calm mind, the closer he is to strength.”

I’m a weak man indeed!

Jean-Jacques also said, “Man is born free, but he is everywhere in chains. How true a saying…

I see my weakness, I recognize my struggles. Only God can pull me out of this. Only God can bless my day and give me rest in the night. Im hopeful, I believe in the promises of God and for sure it’s gonna get better.

No amount of regrets changes the past.

No amount of anxiety changes the future.

But any amount of gratitude changes the present.

Matthew 11:28

Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.